God unBoxed

As is evidenced throughout this blog… I go through a consistent dry spell of writing. Why is this? Well, honestly, it seems I lose interest. Anyone who knows me knows that I’ve always got something to say and an opinion about everything, but it seems that I go through a period of being completely uninterested in actually writing any of it down.

So, I find myself in another one of these periods. I’m told that in order to maintain an audience, I need to be consistent… so it appears I have failed on this count. Still trying to think through how to change this - but it may never happen.

So, until next time… whenever that is.

Tomorrow morning, I head to Dallas to pick up my family from the airport and bring them home. To say I’m looking forward to this is obvious, and an understatement. I’ve missed them terribly. Jana has called me just about every day and I’ve gotten to talk to my little girls a few times as well which was great. It was obvious they were having a great time. For that, I am very thankful.

God has richly blessed me with a family such as this. I have a wife that, to my eyes, is the most beautiful, thoughtful, and caring woman in the world. She goes out of her way to bless me in multiple ways and I know that I don’t thank her enough. My eldest daughter, Zoë, loves her daddy and I can’t wait for her to come home and tell me her stories in non-stop fashion. She’s bright, intelligent, funny, and the prettiest little princess in the world (okay - I’m biased). My youngest daughter, Téya, also beautiful, is so full of life and the most expressive little girl I’ve ever known.

Yes, I am blessed. Quite often, I find myself taking this beautiful family of mine for granted. I forget, as we all do, what an incredible part of my life they are. In fact, they define an aspect of who I am… I believe this is God’s design. Our families are supposed to define a part of our personality, habits, and character. That’s why it’s so important to recognize the blessings and work to overcome any difficulties.

So, right now, I meditate on the blessing of family once again. It’s been a lonely week (no - not sob, sob, lonely… but lonely). Empty house. Quiet. Too quiet. I got to talk with them just about every night, but it’s not the same.

Tomorrow, I will bask in the loving presence of the three most important people in my life (save Christ, of course). Today, my heart longs for their presence. Tomorrow, we’ll talk and laugh and the loneliness will be gone. Today, I am deeply thankful that I have a family to long for that loves me. Tomorrow, I want to remember and be thankful. Today, I praise my Creator, God, and Friend that He has seen fit to open my eyes to the blessing that is family.

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I came back from dropping my wife and two daughters at DFW airport this morning so that they can spend some time with Jana’s family in Minnesota. While I was happy that we could make this happen, it was a sad moment for me. While I am always sad to be away from my wife of almost 17 years, a few other items have made this a sad time for me.

My eldest, Zoë (4 yrs old - 5 in December), is at the stage of life where everything is an articulated discovery. I’m sad that I won’t get to see and hear as she sees Minnesota through the eyes of a 4-yr old. She’s been there before, but at almost 5 yrs old, it’s going to be an incredibly exciting time for her full of new sounds and smells and sights. She’s at that stage of life where she gets into the non-stop talking phase as she describes what she’s feeling and experiencing. While this can be difficult at times (especially when you’re tired), it’s still amazing to listen to and experience and I cherish those moments.

My youngest, Téya (22 months - 2 yrs old in November) is also at an age of discovery. What she’s discovering is language. Every day she learns new words and begins putting phrases together for the first time. I won’t be there to hear some of those new words and phrases or to laugh with her as she tries to figure out what to say (and says a completely strange word while trying) during times when what she sees is totally new.

My wife - my lovely wife - one of God’s most amazing gifts to me will have the “joy” of dealing with these two adorable girls all by herself. This can be a difficult time for her and one of the blessings I can provide to her is the much needed respite or additional reinforcement when the will of a child is attempting to circumvent the wiser counsel of her parent. I’ll miss being there for her to help when she needs it or to stand in awe of the wisdom God has given her as she patiently instructs. Please pray with me that God would grant her an extra measure of wisdom and patience and pray, also, that God will grant our daughters an extra measure of obedience and attentiveness.

This is not a bitter entry - no, it’s actually an exciting one. I realize that though I am apart from them in person, they are mine and I am theirs. The gift that God has graced each of us through being a family is immeasurable. Missing them is actually a beautiful reminder that I have three amazing people to miss. Not having them near to me makes me desire their closeness once again.

So, yes, I am in a bittersweet mood, but I remain ever thankful for what I have received in the gift of my adoring family. Thank You, my sweet Lord and Father for granting me such mutual love to share and bask in and treasure. They are Yours, of course, but You have also made them mine and made me theirs. How incredible it is to have this small piece of Your glory reflected in our simple lives.

And to my girls - if you’re reading this - I love you more than words can say and look forward to seeing your beautiful faces next Saturday. Have fun!! And may God’s amazing and continual grace give you the strength to bless all you come into contact with and that they, too, will have the indelible mark of His presence with them because He has loved through you. Hugs and Kisses!!

Another infection that rears its ugly head in American Christendom is our tendency to define our faith by what we don’t do rather than what we do. “I don’t drink, I don’t chew, I don’t go out with girls who do.” I know, I know - this is an old saw and we’ve improved over the prudish tendencies of those anti-makeup and anti-style fundies of old… but I contend that we have only decided to bless a different brand of cow.

“They will know we are Christians by our love…” is loosely based on John 13:34-35 where Jesus makes clear that our love for one another will be our distinctive that definitively marks us as one of His. Now, debate all you want about whether this means love amongst fellow brothers in Christ or our love for people in general… not really what I’m going to talk about. The “being known by love” concept seems to have become twisted into “being friendly” - shiny, happy people holding hands, singing Kumbaya.

How did it become more important to be known for what we don’t engage in rather than what we do? How did it become more important to end abortion than it is to end poverty? (Note: Don’t read into that - I’m pro-life.) How did we turn the name of Christ into something signifying prudishness rather than lives lived intentionally loving those He has called us to? We’ve become legalists - if not in actual practice, we’ve done so in rhetoric (which is far worse).

Don’t get me wrong - the Christian community should have obvious differences from the surrounding world - a lighted city on a hill, but as Keller points out, we shouldn’t look so different that we’re unrecognizable as a human being. After all - that’s fake and it’s a bald-faced lie (and this has the side-effect of making confession that much harder). We Christians are still just as frail and still wage a daily war against sin and, honestly, no better than those outside the household of faith. Our distinctive should not to be our “high morals.” Our distinctive should be loving action with an evident striving towards holiness. Our distinctive should include Jesus in our language and actions - the Gospel always on our lips with our love for Christ deeply evident in who we are.

Let’s face it - claiming “high morals” is a cop out. We wish we had them, but it’s a constant war to battle sin in our lives and we lose more often than we’d like to admit. “Clean living” never saved anyone. Going out into the world to preach the Gospel to every living creature has saved millions. It’s interesting that the emphasis of Christ’s ministry was actively loving and declaring peace, not moral striving. Yes, we should be striving to live moral lives - absolutely - but we must stop wearing this as some badge of honor. We suck at it and we’re not fooling anyone.

Yes, this is an echo of my previous blog entry and that message will hopefully be echoed time and time again. How should we be known? By what we do - not what we don’t. People are less interested in your morality than they are in what you’re doing to better the world we live in by sharing the love of Christ with others. Think about it - if you feed a hungry person, or clothe someone in need of clothing, or give water to a thirsty person… the action is hard to condemn - regardless of your morality. So - be moral - yes - but do something that shows Christ to the people you encounter every day. In this - Christ will refine you and through this - you will give witness to the love within you that compells you to be more than you could ever be without Him.

Looking out for number one is almost ingrained in the American psyche. While there seems to be some leanings away from this ingrained mentality, the typical behavior points to self-infatuation still taking center-stage. I know - it’s no surprise - you encounter selfish people every day when driving, standing in line, whatever. Yeah… that’s nice, but not talking about “other people” - nope… I’m really talking about me… and probably you too.

Obviously, this is all Adam’s fault. After all, he’s the moron who let his wife eat the fruit. After all, we all know that none of us would have been that stupid or selfish, right? Heck - it’s one stinkin’ tree! So, He blows it and we go from ONE rule to TEN!? How’s that for ruining it for the rest of us?

Well, truth is… I would have blown it sooner and more drastically. I would’ve been too excited about having a naked woman next to me all the time to even mention anything about a tree. Wait - they didn’t know they were naked? Really - you’re going with the literal rendition there? Sorry, bub, they had eyes - they just didn’t know what “naked” was or that it was “bad” to not have your body parts covered… I really doubt Adam was completely oblivious to the beauty of his wife.

So, where does that leave us? Well, we’re selfish ingrates by and large. Even when we try to be selfless, we tend to do it for recognition or, at the very least, to pat ourselves on the back. How do we break this? By living for someone other than ourselves. No - not that guy or gal you’re hot for either. Living for another human being will just burn you both out and most certainly will not end well for either of you.

Of course - the big DUH! here is we have to live for Jesus and not ourselves. [yawn] Yeah, I know, real downer that I would go and say something so stupidly obvious and cliche. How many times have we heard that in our lives? More times than I can count. But wait… before you just disregard my obviousness and count this as yet another trite little article - let me elaborate a bit.

Living for Jesus is not spouting a million Bible verses everyday. Living for Jesus is not seeing every human being as a person with a bright red target painted on them so you can use them for Bible verse throwing practice. Living for Jesus is not making sure EVERYONE knows about your list of things you simply won’t do because you’re a Christian. Living for Jesus is not, in any way, shape, or form measured by the number of converts you’ve got notched in that Gospel Gun. Nope. None of that can be used as a way for you to prove, convince, prod, hope, or acquire holiness.

Living for Jesus is recognizing that He is more important than you are. Oh - you think that’s already true? Who was the last naked person you clothed? Who was the last thirsty person you gave a drink to? Who was the last person you helped with sleeping accommodations? Too literal? Okay - who was the last person you know would qualify as “the least of these” that you actually DID something (anything) for to alleviate some amount of pain in their lives? I can’t remember when I’d last done anything for anyone else with any intentionality that could remotely qualify for fulfilling this clear Scriptural concept uttered by Jesus Himself.

Living for Jesus? Yep - it takes intentional living. We have to reformat our brains into realizing the word “living” in this context is not and cannot be passive. It doesn’t simply mean “breathing” or “existing” it means actively living in the reality that your life is not your own. Man - I suck at this… good thing He’s promised to help. I should probably ask Him more often, shouldn’t I?

In the American Christian culture, we have been seduced by our belief in the fundamental right for us to keep whatever we want private from whomever we want. Now, before the conspiracy theorists run off half-cocked and start screaming about “Big Brother” and how awful it would be if we didn’t have privacy laws… stop - I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about me… and you - especially if you’re a Christian. I’m not saying we should let the government or anyone just start poking around in our lives without due cause or due process - I’m talking about our own fundamental attitudes regarding our lives and who gets to know what.

In our churches - especially among men - we have something I call Mutually Assured Depravity. I know I sin, I know you sin, I don’t know yours and you don’t know mine… let’s just keep it that way. After all, unless my sin becomes public, why should I burden you with the struggle of being embarassed to know me? So, although confession is something that is clearly discussed in Scripture (James 5:13-16; 1 John 1:5-10), we do not practice it in spirit.

Don’t get me wrong - I know that many of us can claim that we practice it technically because we have no problem raising our hand and saying that we’re dealing with “anger issues” or “road rage” or “pride” or “jealousy” or some other socially acceptable sin (made so due to our adoption of a humanistic moral code rather than a Biblical one). But heaven forbid we talk about real problems like porn addiction, dislike of our spouse, theft, deep hatred, or mental infidelity (fantasizing about a person who is not your spouse).

In his book Humility: True Greatness, C. J. Mahaney discusses at some length our need to be proactive in confession. If we truly desire to pursue Christ, we must utilize the greatest earthly tool we’ve been given to help root out the sin in our heart - other people. We know our sin. In our darkest moments and most difficult times when we reflect on the condition of our heart with an honest eye, we see the monsters that lurk within. Richard once preached about knowing what the monster looks like and ensuring we tell the people we love so they can more readily know when the monster is ruling our actions or motivations.

The problem we have when we seek correction for the sin in our heart is twofold: 1) most of the people we would confess to will readily forgive us just to make the uncomfortable conversation go away or 2) we are really only trying to get it off of our chest and have no real desire to change. This has a tendency to lead us to a place where we confess with the pure intention of being forgiven and prayed for AND having no desire to really change. What’s worse? The confessor and the confessee both want it this way. Mutually Assured Depravity.

How do we break this? We must intentionally seek a person who is both willing to listen with grace and without judgment, but also willing to take us to task and hold us accountable. Once we find this person, we must be honest with them and listen to the very difficult words they have to say. Wow. Finding that person is hard enough… being honest with them? Incredibly difficult.

Step 1 - be that person. Stop judging people by what you think their sin might be or what you think they might not get about the Gospel. Stop considering yourself somehow more enlightened or blessed with knowledge than others. Recognize your own need to root our your sin and how desperately depraved you are when left to your own devices. Recognize that you are the worst sinner you know… it’s absolutely true. If you ever believe that someone else’s sin is greater than your own - you are in a desperate state and I recommend you find someone to kick you in the butt until you recognize just how stupid (and dangerous!) it is to think that anyone else’s sin is in any way greater to or equal to your own.

Step 2 - be honest with the person closest to you. Start small if you’d like - but start. You start seeking correction from this person. If you’re married - it should be your spouse. If you’re not, it should be your closest Christian friend (of the same gender - really, I mean that). Start talking to them not as a counselor, but by asking them to help you by explaining what the sin is and how you act when you’re in that state and then ask them to pull you aside and start asking the hard questions when you start acting that way. You must seek the help of others or your own sin will kill you, or at the very least make you utterly useless to others who need the same thing.

Mutually Assured Depravity is an infection in American Christendom. Why do pastors fall into sexual or relational sin? Why do so many people flock to churches that have absolutely no implementation of church discipline? Why do so many marriages look great until they don’t? Why do so many children leave the church as soon as they graduate from high school never to return? We have no culture of confession. Instead we have mimicked the World culture and created superheroes, rock stars, and mini-Christ’s incapable of heinous sin. It’s a lie - we’re all capable and it’s about time we admitted it to someone.

Austin has been hot lately - the 100s have been the norm for a good while now. Supposedly we’re about to have a turn for some relatively cooler weather. It’s amazing how easy it is to get excited about 92 when it’s been 102 or higher for what seems like weeks. In most parts north - 92 is always hot and never considered “relatively cool.” God has designed us it seems so that we can get acclimated (to a certain degree) and that which would be uncomfortable for most becomes, if not comfortable, a welcome respite.

Life is like this. There are Christians in other lands that believe that living the faith equates to bleeding for Christ. For us in America, this is an unfathomable lifestyle. Here in the land of the free and the home of the brave, we are in bondage to our way of life and afraid someone will try to take it from us. That is neither freedom nor bravery.

That is not to say that I do not count myself as blessed to live in this great nation. I love my country. I am proud that there have been men and women who have shown great bravery to protect the freedoms that we all cherish (though I must pessimistically add that most of us have crossed over into considering our freedoms to be entitlements). We have lost our way it seems. Comforts have taken their place as the great goal of life.

What does this mean for the American Christian? How should this inform and affect our choices? Love where God has placed you. While it is impossible for you to truly fathom what others experience in a place where there is no such thing as freedom or in a place where Christians are put to death for their beliefs - it is not impossible for you to have faith that God knows what He is doing. If you call upon the name of Christ and have trusted Him as your Savior… the faith you need has already been provided by the Holy Spirit.

Love where God has placed you. If you, like me, prefer colder climes but God has placed you in the midst of 100 degree weather… trust Him to change your heart so that the burden of heat becomes a blessing. If you would prefer a safer place to raise your children and God has placed you in a crime ridden area… trust Him to provide hope in the midst of that dark place. If you would prefer a picturesque retirement community in the country but God has placed you in the midst of a loud and obnoxious city… trust Him to give you quiet in the midst of the noise.

God does not make mistakes and you have not been placed where you are in vain. Wherever you are, God has called you there for this season at this time. Even if He has called you elsewhere… until He moves you, He’s called you where you are. Love where God has placed you because the place you are in is crying out for Him whether they know it or not. Love where God has placed you because love is the vessel through which God will pour your life out to reveal His glory and bring His own back to Himself. Love where God has placed you simply because it is Him who has placed you there.

Let us pray for faith. Let us pray for courage. Let us pray that God will place within our hearts a burden for where he has placed us: home, work, or play. Let us pray for insight into the lives of the people we encounter. Let us pray for humility to love the people we’re with every day with the love of Christ. Let us pray for courage to reveal to these people the glory of the Father by showing them His son Jesus. Let us pray for our neighbors, our coworkers, and our friends that God would see fit to reveal Himself to them in a mighty way and that we, in some way, might be instrumental in that revelation. Not for our glory, but for the privilege of participating in what only He can do… save the dead and cause them to be born again into life.

I’m the worst sinner I know. It’s true - I don’t know of anybody who is a greater sinner than I. Paul called himself “the chief of sinners” - I feel the same way. I know of nobody whose heart is as dark as my own. I know of nobody whose thoughts are as bereft of anything that is holy as are my thoughts. I can’t number a single person whose eyes betray God’s commands more than mine. Only I know the innermost recesses of my heart, the depravity of my mind, or the covetousness of my eyes.

Too often, we’re tempted to call out the good things we’ve done or the bad things we haven’t done to mark ourselves in some way as measuring up to some assumed standard. We use our relative measuring rod to see if we’re as bad as that guy down the block who beats his wife. Surely not. We look at just how angry other people can get or how bad their visible sin is that we are tempted to feel more satisfied that we would never do that. Even if we recognize in our mind that we aren’t good, we still feel like we aren’t really bad.

Well, it’s a lie, isn’t it? We are, by very nature, children of wrath according to Scripture. If we call upon the name of Christ, it is true that we are redeemed and we are given a new nature… but Scripture is obvious in the fact that our old nature never truly dies on this side of glory. We are constantly at war with it - Scripture calls this old nature “the flesh.” It’s metaphorical in that it is the part of us that is human and tied to the sin of our father Adam. Our new nature is spirit and tied to our spiritual father (those of us called by His name) Jesus.

What I must remind myself is that I am naturally inclined to do the opposite of what God would have me do. My natural inclination is to protect myself or what I hold dear. My sin nature, unchecked, would kill me. Thankfully, we have the Spirit to help us in this - He reminds us of Christ’s life, death, and resurrection; He reminds us that we are new creations and have been brought from death to life; He reminds us that we are not alone and this war is not waged in vain. God is fully involved and is presently helping us through every battle - even the ones we lose - to draw us nearer to Him and to conform us more and more into the image of His son.

I’m the worst sinner I know… but God chose me anyway. I can think of no one more vile than I… but Christ died a tortuous and grizzly death so that I could know Him. I know no person with more shame regarding the thoughts and intents of his heart… but the Spirit still presses me further and, incredibly, works through my hands to bring love, light, and healing to others.

How can I help but worship Him?

How does this happen? You go to sleep in a good mood (granted, it was late) but then wake up in a foul one. So, here I sit on a Saturday morning inexplicably grumpy. I’m tired (which I’m sure doesn’t help), my head is in a fog (which also doesn’t help), but I also just couldn’t care less about much of anything. Very Christian of me.

What’s worse - is sitting here and recognizing that you’re being a grumpy jerk to your own family and overreacting (within my mind - not always overtly) to every little thing that happens. You know you’re overreacting and, in fact, you know you’re being a jerk and a grump… but are seemingly incapable of forcing yourself to change. “Be happy! Be of good cheer!” Whatever.

How desperately we need our Lord in these situations. What a reminder of just how ridiculously selfish I am and that I must cling to my Savior in these moments - especially when I don’t really want to. God’s grace to me is that he allows me to see my sin for what it is - selfish, pigheaded, and just plain mean. These are the moments you start questioning your own salvation until God reminds you of just how much He loves you by telling you just how stupidly you’re acting in the kind and firm way that only He can.

Psalm 51:1-6

So, here I sit, clinging to God finally - recognizing that He is my help, my salvation, my fortress, my strong tower, and, most importantly, my joy.